A workout? Really?

A "workout" is a run that's over three miles. A "workout" is bench pressing your weight and then talking about it to the other guys in the gym while you drink water from the fountain and towel off your face. A "workout" is playing a full 48 minute game on the basketball court.

When engaging in a "workout" you should never hear the following words out loud:

• Peacock Pose


• Dolphin Plank Pose


• Firefly Pose


• Cow Face Pose


• Lotus Pose


• Feathered Peacock Pose


• ______ Pose (unless you see Arnold Schwarzenegger in the gym and you command him to pose by saying "Arnold Schwarzenegger Pose!")

"Crane" was not included in this list because I think Karate is badass.